Ritual vs. Routine: Are you feeling stuck in a rut?

More and more of my calls and virtual appointments have been going like this:

“I just don’t care. I’m not motivated to eat health or exercise. I’m not interested in spending time with my husband. Even Zoom calls with friends are taking too much energy.”

If I had to guess, I would guess most of you reading this are feeling the same.

We tend to have plenty of ROUTINES – we watch an episode or 2 of our favourite show on Friday night, we have a glass of wine after the kids are in bed, we cook breakfast with our partner on Sundays, we go to yoga on Thursdays. But these routines are done on autopilot. They are automatic and we barely think twice about them.

We are lacking ritual.

Rituals are something you can practice daily!

RITUALS bring you closer – to your self, to your friends, to your kids, to your partners. ⁠

They foster connection. ⁠Rituals are purposeful and mindful. ⁠They are not mindless, accidents that we fall into.

They go deeper, are more spiritual and you can actually feel the hormone cascades releasing the feel good neurotransmitters when you partake.⁠

When done correctly, and repeatedly, rituals will start to give you that ” Yes. This. I want more of this.” feeling. When was the last time you felt that?

✨🌿💫

And the best part is that rituals are pandemic budget friendly aka FREE.

Here is a list of some of my favourite rituals:

1. Greet your partner when you get home from work (or close your laptop). If you’re stuck at home with your significant other, you may forgetting to really check in. Do it mindfully and on purpose. Tip: stop whatever you are doing and hug for at least 30 seconds so that you can start to release oxytocin, the connection hormone. You can see me speak more on this on Arizona Family news HERE.
2. Listen to a podcast or audio book with your partner or a friend. Tip: make a tea (or pour a glass of wine) and put all other distractions away. Make sure you hold hands or sit close enough to touch if you are with your partner, this will also release connection hormones and neurotransmitters
   Here are a list of podcasts I am on that might be of interest:
   Glambition Radio
   Fierce Feminine Leadership
   Rebel Talk

3. Spend 2 minutes gazing into your partners eyes as soon as you wake up. You do not have to say anything, just lay there and enjoy feeling connected without touch. We get so busy that many couples are looking down at their phones and not spending as much time connecting deeply.
4. Read to your partner. Call a friend a read them a particularly poignant passage from your current book. This one is my favourite! There is something so therapeutic about reading to someone or being read to. We do not think twice about doing this with our children, why not incorporate it into your rituals! Make sure you take the time to do this before you are exhausted at the end of the day, because it might put you to sleep.

Has this struck a chord? Learn how to break out of the routines that aren’t serving you and let pleasure back into your life with a lifeline for connection and ritual.

SHETalks Virtual is starting on June 10th. Join from anywhere and start a ritual that will being joy and connection back to your life. Find more info here!

-Dr. Jordin